Saturday, September 24, 2005

common place blog

The Miscarriage
by Amit Majmudar
published in Poetry October 2005

Some species can crack pavement with their shoots
to get their share of sun some species lay
a purple froth of eggs and leave it there
to sprinkle tidepools with tadpole confetti
some species though you stomp them in the carpet
have already stashed away the families
that will inherit every floor at midnight
But others don’t go forth and multiply
as boldly male and female peeling the bamboo
their keepers watchng in despair or those
endangered species numbered individually
and mapped from perch to oblivious perch

For weeks the world it seemed was plagued
with babies forest dwindling into cradles
rows of women hissing for an obstetrician
babies no one could feed babies received
by accident like misdirected mail
from God so many babies people hired
women to hold them babies babies everywhere
but not a one to name When we got home
the local news showed us a mother with
quintuplets she was suckling them in shifts
a mountain of sheets universally admired
a goddess of fertility her smile
could persuade the skies to rain Her litter
slept ointment-eyed in pink wool caps while Dad
ran his hand through his hair thinking maybe
of money as he stood surveying his
crowded living room his wealth of heartbeats

Pizza and pop that night and there unasked inside
the bottlecap was Sorry—Try Again
you set it down and did not speak of it
the moon flanked by her brood of stars that night
a chaste distracted kiss good night that night
your body quiet having spilled its secret
your palms flat on your belly holding holding

Forgive me if I had no words that night
but I was wondering in the silence still
begetting silence whether to console you
if I consoled you it would make the loss
your loss and so we laid beside ourselves
a while because I had no words until
our bodies folded shut our bodies closed
around hope like a book preserving petals
a book we did not open till the morning when
we found hope dry and brittle but intact

3 Comments:

Blogger JennyMack said...

I recently heard about a company called Extend Fertility (www.extendfertility.com). They help women take control of their biological clock using an egg freezing technology. I’m 35 and single and considering this procedure. It will allow me to save my eggs now, so I can use my healthier and younger eggs in the future when I’m ready to have a baby. Has anyone had their eggs frozen or know more about this?

8:55 AM  
Blogger Heidi Lynn Staples (formerly Heidi Peppermint) said...

jenny, i don't know about this. sorry. i'd be interested to hear what you learn, if you pursue it further. all best, heidi

8:13 PM  
Blogger jennymack5 said...

Heidi, I have been inquiring some more. The procedure does take a bit of effort- you need to take fertility drugs before the eggs can be extracted and its not cheap. Yet if you are not forseeing yourself having kids till late 30's early 40's like myself, it has much better odds than trying to use IVF with your older eggs. I haven't made a final decision, but i think its an option worth looking into further.

4:29 PM  

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